From managing autoimmune issues to simply trying to do right by your body, and having specific dietary needs to limiting alcohol intake, there are plenty of things about choosing a cleaner lifestyle that might make dating feel a bit . . . tricky.
Well, I’m here to tell you there are plenty of non-awkward ways to make it work! I’m a firm believer that we shouldn’t put life – or dating – on hold while we’re focusing on healing or caring for our bodies. Let’s talk about how to make it all work.
Doing dinner dates with dietary restrictions
For starters, I recommend saving dinner until you’re a few dates in – not because of anything dealing with this topic, but only because I don’t think it’s a preferable environment for really getting to know each other. So, if you can, maybe opt for coffee instead (and take the cup o’ joe on the go!).
I did a blog post on why I think walking coffee dates are the best for the first few meetups. Read it HERE.
But, if you’re sitting down to share a meal, here’s how to navigate:
If you’re going out to eat:
- Check the menu ahead of time. This will help you pick out what might work for you. If it checks most of the boxes, you can casually request some alterations from the waiter if necessary. Looking ahead of time will also help you feel less anxious or pressured to just choose something in the moment (especially while you’re trying to hold a conversation at the same time).
- Eat beforehand. I’m not saying you need to have a full meal before your date, but especially if you’re headed into unchartered territory menu-wise, it helps if you don’t come famished. Balance that blood sugar with a high-protein snack about an hour beforehand. It’ll help you feel steadier, more in control, and sidestep unintentionally binging on the breadbasket (anyone else do this when you’re a bit nervous?! LOL).
If he’s cooking for you:
It’ll likely be a minute into dating before you get to this part, so hopefully you’ll have a chance to get comfortable with each other first. But, whether it’s date five or fifteen, here’s some help to make it smooth and simple.
- Pick the big one (the biggest thing to avoid). This will help make sure you’re not eating something that’ll make you feel like crud, but will still leave a touch of running room for the chef! Recently, when a guy cooked for me, he very kindly asked if there was anything he should avoid. So, I asked if we could skip gluten, and he was happy to oblige. Dinner was still amazing, he didn’t feel limited in the kitchen, and I felt great afterwards. So, if you can, pick the top thing that you know you keep out of your diet in order to feel your best. Win-win-win.
- Get verbal. Tell them how much you love what they made! If dinner includes some stuff your body maybe won’t be thrilled with, you don’t have to feel pressured to take big servings (if you’re serving yourself) or to clean your plate. To let your date know you really enjoyed and appreciate what they made, just tell them! A few thoughtful compliments will go a long way 🙂
To drink or not to drink?
This is a question for you and no one else. First, I know how it feels to wonder if someone will think you’re a doorknob if you choose not to drink alcohol on a date. But I can assure you, it’s not nearly as dramatic as we imagine. I’ve skipped the booze and had a plenty good time, and my date definitely didn’t mind (in fact, I don’t even think he noticed). Here’s how you can be a Sober Sally without seeming like a Debbie Downer.
- Order a mocktail. And do it confidently! It’s all the luxury of a cocktail, without the liquor. There are plenty of options out there that are pretty, tasty, and come in a great glass. Plus, most of them have names that sound just like cocktails, so you can slide your order in place of an alcoholic beverage without anyone even knowing.
- Lead with positivity! If the subject comes up, focus on what you’re gaining instead of what you’re skipping. I’ve said everything from “I’m loving on my liver for a few weeks” to “I’m really feeling amazing – this has been just the break I needed!” As long as you’re secure in your choice, the person who’s there to get to know you will also appreciate that about you.
Get active!
For a good way to simplify, just skip food and beverage altogether, and get outside! Take a stroll, go for a hike, try a new game, or hop on a bike. From axe throwing to walking the monuments (which is even cooler at night!), I’ve been on some awesome activity-centered dates. Some sunshine and fresh air can really add to the enjoyment. Plus, it’s fun to get creative, and come up with some unique ways to spend time together.
Wishing you health and wellness, and lots of great dates!
XOXO,
Carrie
