This week we’re back with the last installment of A Single Girl’s 30 AFTER 30!
In my experience, these single girl life lessons fit into seven categories: Faith, Dating, Community, Personal, Professional, Health, and Financial. And these categories are just as great for goal setting as they are for reflecting. If you’re looking to make the most of the rest of this year, or get a head start on preparing for the next, grab my freebie, The Seven Habits of a Happy Single Woman. If you don’t have this resource yet, you can grab your free copy here.
In this post, you’ll find different lessons from each of those seven categories. Here are #21 though #30 of a Single Girl’s 30 After 30! Be sure to check out the previous blog for #1 through #10 and this blog for #11 through #20!
FAITH:
21. God writes the most epic love stories.
…and he’ll make sure yours is amazing, too! Trust me, I’ve gotten to watch him do it time and time again.
It’s never too late, never too hopeless, never too far out of reach. Not for him. He makes beauty from ashes, so he certainly can give you a fairytale.
Just a heads up, it’ll probably look nothing like what you thought. But rest assured, darling, it’ll be better. It just will.
DATING:
22. It’s OK that you’re still not married. (Seriously!)
When I was in my 20s, I never thought that I’d be entering my mid-30s unmarried. But here we are.
Once we reach our 30s, the pressures to hurry up and settle down start to feel a bit heavier. But that doesn’t mean you should settle. Stay the course, and wait for what you know you deserve.
Mostly, because risk is a lot easier to reconcile with than regret. But also, because we’re finally getting to the good part.
23. There’s a difference between a great guy and the right guy.
You know that guy: the great guy, who really is as great as he seems, except for one thing…he’s just not it.
You’ve been on multiple dates with him, you’ve spent quality time getting to know him, and you’ve tried six ways from Sunday to see if you could “make it work.”
A lot of messy dating in my 20s left me craving consistency and chivalry and – let’s be real – even a taste of security. And then, when I leveled up in dating, I realized…
He can be a seriously great guy, and still not be the right guy.
Dating well usually means meeting a lot of great guys. Waiting well means trusting your gut and not just settling for “good enough.”
COMMUNITY:
24. Friendship isn’t limited by age or circumstance.
Your 30s bring a lot of variation, and your girlfriends will likely fall into a wide range of single, married, and motherhood (maybe some have 3 or 4 kids by now…). Real friendship isn’t dependent on being in the same place at the same time. You can love each other well through life’s ups and downs, even in very different seasons.
It’s not about walking the same path, it’s about choosing to walk hand-in-hand, no matter what paths you’re on.
25. There is no replacement for fierce female friendship.
Iron sharpens iron.
It’s important to have quality men in your life, and having great guy friends is a major blessing (10/10 recommend!). But nothing can replace what women can do for each other.
If you haven’t already, find your girl tribe (it’s never too late!), lean on them, and let them lean on you. Life is way better when girlfriends do it together!
PERSONAL:
26. You can have it all and you can be it all, but you can’t do it all.
You can be multiple things and have all of your dreams. But you can’t expect yourself to juggle all day every day and never drop the ball.
Burnout is legit. And it doesn’t come from having too many roles in life or dreaming too big – it’s the result of running yourself ragged while you try to make it all happen.
Sometimes you have to say no, but usually you just have to ask for help. Ask often, and then let yourself receive the help you asked for.
PROFESSIONAL:
27. You’ll learn more from failure than you will from success.
I spent much of my 20’s fearing failure, because I thought it would somehow lock me out of my chances for success. I’m so glad to say that I got that so wrong. In fact, sometimes it was failure that led me to what I needed to achieve success.
Success affirms us, but failure challenges and grows us. So instead of fearing it, when you meet it, face it and let it guide you towards your next achievement.
28. You get to decide what success looks like.
There are so many different ideas of what it means to be successful, most of which revolve around careers, and usually have something to do with titles and salaries.
Promotions are great, and so are sizable paychecks. But, never hesitate to ask yourself what you’re sacrificing to get there, and whether it’s worth it to you.
When it comes to success, the most important measurement is your quality of life. You don’t have to play by other people’s rules. Make your own, and make sure they match your priorities.
HEALTH:
29. Focus internally, and you’ll benefit externally, too.
When we focus on improving how we feel, how we look will often improve as well. But if we focus on how we look, it can sabotage how we feel. Healing happens from the inside, out. We have to do the internal work first.
Prioritize wellness and your body will naturally reflect that. Prioritize appearance and wellness will remain an afterthought.
FINANCIAL:
30. The more generous you are with your money, the more you seem to have.
I’m guessing it’s because generosity cannot come from a place of scarcity; it comes from a place of abundance. But, regardless of the math involved, I can honestly say it always works out this way. Generosity will never leave you poor.
That’s it for A Single Girl’s 30 AFTER 30! I hope you’ve loved reading these as much as I’ve loved writing them!
